Do I legally have to communicate with stepmom?

Reading your question tells me that youre wanting to just live a peaceful life even after divorce, like anyone else, it really must be hard to maintain a normal life after and then seeing that your ex is still keeping the friction at a high is not much help. Nope,You do not have a legal obligation to speak with her or anyone in life, this is not written in stone. However, If your Ex is more comfortable w/ his new wife to give updates and if the situation was a peaceful one, unlike yours, then id say to hell w/ him if he doesnt want to talk and just go w/ it and just talk to the lady only when necessary. If you so choose to speak w/ her at your own will then I definatly wouldnt discuss any negative behavior about youre children and indulge in any discussion putting your children down or anything that is off the importance of the topic. Its not easy dealing w/ an issue that you HAVE to deal w/. #1. I will say you are doing an awesome job by sending your ex doents and updates, (i couldnt imagine doing this myself) #2. Your children are lucky to have at least one mature adult in their life,it's not the issue, its HOW your handling it,(somebody has to,right?) why not make it YOU. In order to manitain the relationship youll need to do what is comfortable for you as well, sounds like they want a lot from you, they are not seeing how this is making you feel. Do somthing for you for a change, youre not married to this man any longer he has taken enough control. Do not allow him to control you any longer, youre a free and single women and raising your beautiful daughters who yearn for a role model who is mature and strong in all her ways.